I couldn't remember when was the last time I cut before this week, and I cut twice within 5 days. It's making me calm and not panic. The constant pain is like a reminder what a shit life I have and what I loser I am. I did so well today till I got forced to go a frd's place for supper and had a three course meal. I need laxatives in me now.
It seems to me that my weight doesn't want to go lower than 102 pounds; hence my bmi is still the same. I have to loose more and make sure that I am the in CONTROL, not the others, not my tummy, not food, JUST ME.
Oh, and I went to a job interview this morning and I wish I'd get the job, as it implies that I will be out of the house more and I won't be monitored as much. Btw, it's a job at the frozen yogart place, which means that I will be surrounded by food constantly and will not be able to have any, how brilliant is that!!!
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